A Suitable Helper Ezer Kenegdo
A Suitable Helper
Ezer Kenegdo
Genesis 2
2 Timothy 1:1-14
Pastor Barry Kerner
Here is a list of inventions by women that you may not have been aware. Where would we be without them?
Circular Saw
Computer
Dishwasher
Life Raft
Fire Escape
Medical Syringe
The First Monopoly Game
Windshield Wipers
Ice Cream Maker
Car Heater
Ironing Board
Coffee Filters
Electric Refrigerator
Wireless Transmission Technology that made WiFi, GPS and Smart Phones able
Disposable Diapers
The list goes on and on.
We’ll today’s Mother’s Day. Mother’s Day sermons are notoriously awful., sentimental tripe that leaves some women feeling smugly self-satisfied, while others leave licking their wounds.
Usually one of three types of sermons is preached on Mother’s Day.
The first is one in celebration of Mother’s. You know, “Mothers are awesome! God loves Mothers! Look at Mary! Way to Go Mary! Way to Go Mothers!”
The second one tells Mother’s how to be better Mothers. “Be like Mary or Hannah or Be a Proverbs 31 Woman” “Happy Mother’s Day…now here is how to be awesome as a mother.”
The third sermon we sometimes hear on Mother’s Day is one that has nothing to do with Mothers. Honor the Mothers…wait – all the women in the congregation, give all the woman a small gift a token of appreciation, and then preach on whatever you would have preached on if it were not Mother’s Day.
The fact is that mothers are serious business. Nobody is loved like a mother. One of the pleasures of being a mother is for a woman to one day hear her daughter ruefully admit that in something she has become exactly like her mother. That girls imitate their mothers is not unusual since mothers are normally their most steady influence. A book on successful marriages should encourage a young men who want a happy life to find a woman twice his age whom he really liked and then marry her daughter.
Mothers also play a pivotal role in their son’s lives. Mothers help their sons to learn how to communicate verbally, to express his emotions, and to share their feelings – things he’s not as likely to learn from his father. Mothers are also the primary women who will demonstrate how their son should treat other women – with love, strength, kindness, and character. Finally, as their sons begin to mature in their mid-teens, others are the ones most able to instill in them the confidence they’ll need to build a successful career and to become a strong husband and father.
A young woman contemplating marriage would find it beneficial to examine the relationship of her fiancee and his mother to get an inkling as to how she may expected to be treated in the marriage.
Mothers read the Bible differently. They consider how it would feel to be unable to feed their children, like Elijah’s widow, the pain Ishmael’s mother Hagar must have felt when her son, Abraham’s first born, was rejected, passed over and along with her, forced out of the family home. Or how difficult it must have been for the mother of Moses, Jochebed, to place her son in a basket, set it adrift, hoping he would live. It’s hard for a mother not to be enraged when Lot offers his daughters to be raped or when David didn’t react to the rape of his daughter Tamar.
Every mother knows the meaning of “Mary pondered these things in her heart.” I believe that the women around Jesus were some of his earliest followers to comprehend His words, and to serve him well. As He died, Jesus made sure His grieving mother would be cared for by a follower. The Church would do well to follow His example.
For the first chapter and a half of the Bible. We see God busy at work; creating the place we call Earth and all that is a part of it. And at every step of the way, God declares his creation “good.” Then it all changes. Halfway through chapter 2, God is busy helping the human, Ha’adam he is called in Hebrew, get acclimated to this new environment. You can eat your fill here in the garden, God tells Adam, just “don’t eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.” But as God is interacting with the human, God discerns that there may be something about creation that is not good. The man has no companion, no counterpart. “It’s not good that the human is alone, I will make him a helper that is perfect for him.” This expression, “helper that is perfect,” in Hebrew does not imply subordination or inferior rank. So it is that none of the animals seems to satisfy the companion that God has envisioned. Because what God seeks for the man is a helper like himself (ezer-kenegdo); something very special, a perfect fit. So God puts Ha’adam into a deep sleep, pulls a rib from his body and fashions a woman.
The first words the Torah quotes Adam as saying appear right after his wife was created. He gives her a name, but also mentions a connection between his name and hers. Genesis 2:23 reads, Then the man said, “This one at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. This one shall be called Woman (isha) for from man (ish) she was taken”.
The Bible tells us that both the man and the woman are created in God’s image and with a specific purpose to fulfill; they are to be helpers to one another as they serve God in the world. And so, like most good stories, this one begins with both a hero and a heroine.
If you’ll open your Bibles to 2 Timothy chapter 1 we’ll be reading verses 1 through 14 today.
There’s no indication in the Bible that Paul’s protege Timothy was married. Most scholars believe Timothy to have been a single young man. In this passage, the Apostle Paul, describes Timothy’s faith as, “sincere faith.” We know it to be the faith through which Timothy was saved. Paul also reminds Timothy that his faith was rooted in the faith of his mother Eunice and his grandmother Lois.
It’s interesting that the woman is not named Eve until after the fall and they are both driven from the garden. Today I want to celebrate women. I know it’s Mother’s Day, and therefore mothers are included in this, but I want to go beyond mothers. I want to speak to the enormous value of all women – a value that world history has never grasped, but one the Bible affirms with absolute conviction!
This morning I would like to look at Ishsha. The woman God created before the fall and whom God calls all women to be in Christ. Today I would like to look at woman as suitable helpers instead of women as mothers. And, in doing so, dispel some misconceptions that a false world view has led us to believe about women.
Earlier I quoted some verses from the Old Testament, Genesis 2:18-20.
The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” – Genesis 2:18-20
The Hebrew words translated, “a helper suitable” are “Ezer Kenegdo.” Everyone say them, “Ezer Kenegdo.” I want you to remember those two words, “Ezer Kenegdo.”
When we hear the word “helper” we generally think of it in terms of a subordinate role. As if the one who bears the title is functioning at a lesser level and must serve the one who is higher up. However, when it comes to the biblical notion of “helper,” nothing could be farther from the truth.
In Hebrew, the word for “helper” used in Genesis 2:18 and 20 is ezer (pronounced “ay-zer”),
God could have given any number of labels to the woman. but He choose Ezer.
In the Old Testament Ezer is always used in the context of vitally important and powerful acts of rescue and support.
It carries the idea of doing for another what they cannot do for themselves. Ezer is most often used in the Scriptures in connection with what God does for His people. God is the ultimate Ezer. Ezer is not a word that means subordination or lesser than. It is a strong, edifying, praiseworthy word that connotes the indispensability of the individual who bears the title. In the case of this Genesis passage, it’s the woman!
The word ezer is used twenty-one times in the Old Testament. Twice it is used in the context of the first woman. Three times it is used of people helping (or failing to help) in life-threatening situations. Sixteen times it is used in reference to God as a helper.
Exodus 18:4 And the other [son of Moses and Zipporah] was named Eliezer, for he said “The God of my father was my HELP, and delivered me from the sword of Pharaoh.”
Deuteronomy 33:7 [Moses’ blessing to Judah] And this regarding Judah, so he said “Hear O Lord the voice of Judah, and bring him to his people. With his hand she contended for them, and mayest Thou be a HELP against his adversaries.”
Deuteronomy 33:26 There is none like the God of Jeshurun [Israel] Who rides the heavens to your HELP, and through the skies in His majesty.
Deuteronomy 33:29 Blessed are you, O Israel; Who is like you, a people saved by the Lord, Who is the shield of your HELP, and the sword of your majesty!
Psalms 33:20 Our soul waits for the Lord; He is our HELP and our shield.
Psalms 70:5 But I am afflicted and needy; hasten to me, O God! Thou art my HELP and my deliverer; ”
Psalms 115:9-11 O Israel, trust in the Lord. He is their HELP and their shield. 10 O house of Aaron, trust in the Lord He is their HELP and their shield. 11 You who fear the Lord, trust in the Lord; He is their HELP and their shield.
Psalms 121:1-2 I will lift up my eyes to the mountains; from whence shall my HELP come? 2 My HELP comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth.
Psalms 124:8 Our HELP is in the name of the Lord; Who made heaven and earth.
Psalms 146:5 How blessed is he whose HELP is the God of Jacob, Whose hope is in the Lord his God;
Hebrews 13:6 so that we confidently say, “The Lord is my HELPER, I will not be afraid. What shall man do to me?
Without exception, these biblical texts are talking about a vital, powerful kind of help.
Ezer is used consistently in a military context. When Israel seeks military aid from her neighbors instead of trusting in the Lord they are rebuked. God is His people’s “shield and defense,” scripture tells us that God is “better than chariots and horses,” and standing “sentry watch over His people.”
Remarkably, even Eden fits this pattern, for although some may balk at the thought, it is fair to say that even the idyllic garden of Eden was a war zone. The command to rule and subdue put God’s image bearers on high alert that fierce resistance lay ahead. God commanded the man to keep, or guard, the garden by using the same military language later used for the cherubim who guarded the garden with a flaming sword — a primeval light saber — after Adam and Eve are evicted (Genesis 3:24). The reason, of course, is that a powerful Enemy is already plotting an attack.
Putting the facts together, isn’t it obvious that the ezer is a warrior? And don’t we already know this in our bones? God created His daughters to be ezer-warriors with our brothers. He deploys the ezer to break the man’s loneliness by soldiering with him wholeheartedly and at full strength for God’s gracious kingdom. Men and the world need everything a woman brings to their global mission.
The strength God brings as ezer to His people should be sufficient to convince us that as ezers we must be strong, resourceful, alert to the cries of the needy and oppressed, and proactive too. Support for the ezer-warrior comes from other Bible passages that use military language for women. Both Ruth and the Proverbs 31 woman are called women of valor (hayil). Paul rallies believers, both men and women, to “put on all of God’s armor” (Ephesians 6:10-17) in preparation to do battle with the Evil One, reminding us that our battle is “not… against flesh-and-blood enemies” (Ephesians 6:12). Thinking of the ezer as a warrior is entirely consistent with how Scripture views us.
In biblical times men’s names contained the word Ezer. Eli-ezer, Abi-ezer, and just plain Ezer are just a few. They were given the name containing Ezer to inspire them.
Like men, women are also God’s creative masterpiece — a work of genius and a marvel to behold — for she is fearfully and wonderful made. The ezer never sheds her image-bearer identity. Not here. Not ever. God defines who she is and how she is to live in His world. That never changes. The image-bearer responsibilities to reflect God to the world and to rule and subdue on His behalf still rest on her shoulders too.
As with “helper,” the word translated as “suitable” doesn’t accurately convey the nature of the Hebrew word. “Suitable” is the Hebrew word kenegdo. Kenegdo is a bit tricky to translate because it is a fusion of three Hebrew words. However, when understood in its proper context, kenegdo means “one who stands in front of or opposite to.” It’s the idea of someone who stands before you, facing you, opposing you, not simply allowing you to go whichever direction you choose. It’s a word picture for how one is to relate to another. In more practical terms, we could say a kenegdo is someone who questions, confronts, challenges, and holds another accountable.
Together, an ezer kenegdo is someone who questions, confronts, challenges, and holds another accountable, in love, for the purpose of aiding and strengthening the collective whole so together they move forward in a healthy and growing relationship, doing for each other what they’re unable to do alone. Talk about a strong, life-giving, and beautiful partnership! And because of the nature and functionality of ezer kenegdo in connection with man
Genesis 2:18 wasn’t intended to establish hierarchy. It was intended to establish partnership.
The woman is created for man as his ezer kenegdo—or as many translations have it, his “help meet” or “helper.” Doesn’t sound like much, does it? It may make some to think of Hamburger Helper but it means something far more powerful than just “helper”; it means “lifesaver.” The phrase is only used elsewhere of God, when you need him to come through for you desperately. “There is no one like the God of Jeshurun, who rides on the heavens to help you” (Deut. 33:26). The woman is a life giver; she is the man’s ally. It takes both men and women to sustain life. Women are to be men’s strongest ally in pursing God’s purposes and his first roadblock when they veers off course.
Here are Apostle Paul’s words from Romans 7:21-25 (New Living Translation):
I have discovered this principle of life – that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death?
Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin. So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus! (Romans 8:1 NLT)
No condemnation! Let these words sink in. If you are a woman, and you belong to Christ Jesus, there is no condemnation! This is grace, pure grace!!! It is my prayer for every woman to realize that in Christ they can find their true identity as one wonderfully and fearfully hand-made by the Creator Himself.
Let us take a moment and pray for the women of our church.
My earnest challenge and prayer for you is . . .
. . . That all of your life—in whatever calling—be devoted to the glory of God.
. . . That the promises of Christ be trusted so fully that peace and joy and strength fill your soul to overflowing.
. . . That this fullness of God overflow in daily acts of love so that people might see your good deeds and give glory to your Father in Heaven.
. . . That you be women of the Book, who love and study and obey the Bible in every area of its teaching; that meditation on biblical truth be the source of hope and faith; that you continue to grow in understanding through all the chapters of your life, never thinking that study and growth are only for others.
. . . That you be women of prayer, so that the Word of God will be opened to you, and so the power of faith and holiness will descend upon you; that your spiritual influence may increase at home and at church and in the world.
. . . That you be women who have a deep grasp of the sovereign grace of God which undergirds all these spiritual processes; and that you be deep thinkers about the doctrines of grace, and even deeper lovers of these things.
. . . That you be totally committed to ministry, whatever your specific calling; that you not fritter away your time on soaps or women’s magazines or unimportant hobbies or shopping; that you redeem the time for Christ and his Kingdom.
. . . That, if you are single, you use your singleness to the full in devotion to God (the way Jesus and Paul and Mary Slessor and Amy Carmichael did) and not be paralyzed by the desire to be married.
. . . That, if you are married, you creatively and intelligently and sincerely support the leadership of your husband as deeply as obedience to Christ will allow; that you encourage him in his God-appointed role as head; that you influence him spiritually primarily through your fearless tranquility and holiness and prayer.
. . . That, if you have children, you accept responsibility with your husband (or alone if necessary) to raise up children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord—children who hope in the triumph of God—sharing with your husband the teaching and discipline they need, and giving them the special attention they crave from you, as well as that special nurturing touch and care that you alone are fitted to give.
. . . That you not assume that secular employment is a greater challenge or a better use of your life than the countless opportunities of service and witness in the home, the neighborhood, the community, the church, and the world; that you not only pose the question: career or full-time homemaker?, but that you ask just as seriously: full-time career or freedom for ministry? That you ask: Which would be greater for the Kingdom—to work for someone who tells you what to do to make his or her business prosper, or to be God’s free agent dreaming your own dream about how your time and your home and your creativity could make God’s business prosper? And that in all this you make your choices not on the basis of secular trends or upward lifestyle expectations, but on the basis of what will strengthen the faith of the family and advance the cause of Christ.
. . . That you step back and (with your husband, if you are married) plan the various forms of your life’s ministry in chapters. Chapters are divided by various things—age, strength, singleness, marriage, employment, children at home, children in college, grandchildren, retirement, etc. No chapter has all the joys. Finite life is a series of tradeoffs. Finding God’s will, and living for the glory of Christ to the full in every chapter is what makes it a success, not whether it reads like somebody else’s chapter or whether it has in it what only another chapter will bring.
. . . That you develop a wartime mentality and lifestyle; that you never forget that life is short, that billions of people hang in the balance of heaven and hell every day, that the love of money is spiritual suicide, that the goals of upward mobility (nicer clothes, cars, houses, vacations, food, hobbies) are a poor and dangerous substitute for the goals of living for Christ with all your might and maximizing your joy in ministry to people’s needs.
. . . That in all your relationships with men (not just in marriage) you seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit in applying the biblical vision of manhood and womanhood; that you develop a style and demeanor that does justice to the unique role God has given to man to feel responsible for gracious leadership in relation to women—a leadership which involves elements of protection and provision and a pattern of initiative; that you think creatively and with cultural sensitivity (just as he must do) in shaping the style and setting the tone of your interaction with men.
. . . That you see the biblical guidelines for what is appropriate and inappropriate for men and women not as arbitrary constraints on freedom, but as wise and gracious prescriptions for how to discover the true freedom of God’s ideal of being complementary; that you not measure your potential by the few roles withheld, but by the countless roles offered; that you look to the loving God of Scripture and dream about the possibilities of your service to him.
We ask this all in the name of our Savior, Jesus Christ, Amen